Come to think of it, it's kind of weird because when I got called I say yes right away. However, prior to the phone call, I had already been thinking about my decision. Something was telling me, I needed to have a decision so my saying yes immediatly, was because I had already been thinking about it for several weeks, actually I think months before. As, the time gets closer to the retreat, I find myself going in to freak out mode. Of course, it doesn't help that my appointment with my endocrinologist is on Monday. I am worried about how my blood work will come out, especially since I have no time to exercise and I have been eating nothing but junk!!!! People keep saying I look good, but honestly I feel like a Zombie and am pretty sure I look like one. I am very close to hitting my maximum peak, however I have decided that I am not going to give in. I am going to do my absolute best to push beyond my peak and create a new peak. What do I plan to do if reach this new peak??? I am going to take a step back, and say hey I did it, and if I don't reach the peak I am still going to take a step back and say hey look what I attempted.
I do have to admit, that this home health therapy job is bring back some very vivid memories of why I left home health a couple years ago. No thyroid + driving around all day = energy drain
I also have to admit that I am very disappointed that I did not get to complete my exercise, and nutrition goals I had set forth for myself. I guess in the end I have to be proud of the things I do accomplish, and rethink strategies to get my health back in order. Also, as a side note: fingers crossed that my doctors appointment goes okay, and that I am able to find a job that better suits energy level and getting my health goals back.
As I typed this up, I started to reflect on a mission I had accomoplished. Earlier in the semester, before my job got super crazy, I decided to go on a run. The challenge was to go up an area called towerview. Well, these were not hills these were mountains (in my mind), especially if you are trying to run up them. I ended up not being able to run up them, it was a very slow walk/climb. As a matter of fact, one of the running coaches ended up waling/climbing with me. I am beginning to think that this was a foretelling of my semester, nothing but one large hill after another. However, at the top the result was a beautiful view. It was also a lesson, when I reached the top I discovered that if I can do this without a thyroid, I can do anything I set my mind too. So, I hope everyone out there reaches for their peak, or beyond whatever that may be.